Medical Mayhem update

I've been waiting to write this, as I've been waiting for things to actual come to a conclusion.  Sadly, nothing seems to be as clear cut as I wish it could be.  

I'm not wed to the diagnoses of bipolar disorder being my issue.  While I'm not against admitting and facing my issues, the more I research the less I think it is me.  I am currently not taking any medicine and am waiting for an appointment with another psychiatrist.  What is with the good doctors not accepting insurance? I'm praying that we'll be reimbursed by our insurance to somehow offset some of the 300 plus cost of just the intake visit. This doctor comes highly recommended, which means enough to me to shell out the big bucks. So first issue not resolved! While I'm not taking any medicine, my 'moods' haven't been too bad as long as I eat every few hours and never allow myself to get super hungry.  I've been having issues getting motivated to leave the house, I haven't gone too far into a depression.  

I was diagnosed with PCOS (poly cystic ovarian syndrome), I don't have many of the classic symptoms (thank god!).  These can include hair loss, thinning, excessive facial hair, acne or patches of dark skin.  I do however have irregular periods, fatigue, weight issues and a blood test confirmed.  I was hoping, praying that I would go into the ob-gyn and they would prescribe me the metformin then and there.  No go. Instead, she told me to go to an endocrinologist. Wow, helpful to have drive all the way over here after waiting 3 weeks for an appointment to tell me I need to get an appointment with someone else.  The next appointment that I can get, is in August. I made an appointment with my primary care physician in two weeks hoping they'd start me on the meds before August.

Another treatment for the symptoms of PCOS is birth control pills. I'm sort of mad that I'm now taking birth control pills when, what I want, is to have a baby. Yes, it is counter intuitive! She really wants, however, to see how much of my depression is actually hormonal.  So, she also put me on prenatal vitamins. 

May I go on a short rant about prescription prenatals? I'm pretty sure they are giving me awful headaches.  Plus, I can't find any list of what is in these pills online. WTF--if they were sold over the counter, it would be required to list what, and how much minerals and vitamins were contained.  The only plus--the over the counter ones are a hell of a lot cheaper (with my co-pay) than they would be over the counter.  I'm going to see if the headaches continue, and if they do, switch to another pill.

I have continued with acupuncture and, at least, my back hasn't been bothering me.  Does it work?  I'm STILL not sure!  I feel pretty good, so I'm going to continue it.  I will however determine that no one will EVER be allowed to stick needles in the back of my hands.  It was really painful, to the point that I had to take a needle out after she left the room.  Most times I don't even feel the needles, but this time it hurt like hell on both sides.  The needle in the middle of my forehead didn't hurt, nor did the one on the top of my head, or my feet.  Once again--anyone have acupuncture stories? 

So days have been really bad, but so far this week has been pretty good.  I am struggling with my weight, energy levels and moods but since I started eating every couple of hours, I haven't gotten in a single fight with my husband.  Cheers!  

Tomorrow is our anniversary. While it is really the anniversary of the day we got married, two years ago, we refer to it as the "paper signing day" because we eloped.  It has been an amazing two years and I can't imagine my life (at least not happily) without my hubby.  Thank you my love.  

On 'Paper Signing Day' waiting before the ceremony

Acupuncture--Does it work? My experience.

Does acupuncture work? I'm not sure. In a way it too similar to the metaphysical 'medicine' that I believe is more psychosomatic than anything else. However it isn't just a simple laying of hands, there is something physically happening to you.

I had two people recently recommend acupuncture to me. First, my chiropractor really thought it would help, and second my gynecologist said that it had been successful in treating infertility.  With a name in hand, I called and scheduled an appointment for Saturday.  I was a little leery, but having tiny needles stuck in me couldn't hurt more than the pain I normally experienced when my back was flaring up, so I wasn't terribly nervous.

I was welcomed into a beautiful, spacious and new building.  The entry is a store (capitalism is alive and well), filled with organic, all natural merchandise including the sheets that they use, which are actually made from recycled glass.  They are insanely soft, just for the record.

I was taken upstairs and offered some tea, or water. The tea was okay, the water, which had orange slices floating in it, was superb. I was given a couple of sheets of paperwork and introduced to my acupuncturist.  We'll call her Deena.  Deena is tall and beautiful with long curly hair and an infectious smile.  She is really open and made me feel comfortable immediately.  She showed me into her room, which is small but beautifully decorated and comfortable.  It immediately made me want to take a nap actually. I was looking forward to laying down on the table, forgetting for a moment that there would be needles stuck in me when that happened.

Something I either didn't expect, or had forgotten about was that they talk to you for 40 minutes before they even needle you. 40 minutes about...me.  Oh well, she explained what acupuncture was, and what it did as well. She discussed my past, my present, my future, my bowel movements and periods.  It was pretty...in depth.

After our conversation I was asked to take my pants off, cover my lower half with a sheet and lay on that comfy table. After a moment she came back in and the whole needling thing starts.  She first explains where she going to put each needle, having me inhale and exhale slowly before doing so.  The first goes in my breast bone, the second two near my hip bones, next my thighs and my ankles.  Then, she leaves me for two minutes after giving me a blanket.

The first question people always ask is 'does it hurt?'  The answer is yes, and no.  I didn't feel the majority of the needles going in, or coming out.  In fact, there were only two that hurt, and I use the word hurt because of the lack of a less 'painful' word in our language.  My left thigh made me jump and my wrist. I wonder still if those hurt because of 'excess energy' as she said, or because the needle went a little deeper.  After she came back after 20 minutes, she needed my wrists quickly (just in an out).  I didn't feel the right one, but the left one hurt and left this little red pin prick where the needle was.  This is why I wonder if the pain really is just the needle going a titsch deeper than it is supposed to, not 'energy.' I joked with my husband that the 'energy' that was being moved was my blood.

When she left me alone for 20 minutes I was left with the instructions to give names to all the nasty stuff that was theoretically leaving my body.  My left foot did do some tingling during all this.  I imagined all the hatred, bitterness, pain, medication, mental illness, fear and sadness leaving my body.  All the toxins of regret and jealousy gone.  Visualization can be good for you. So the visualization took about 5 minutes, followed by boredom followed by umm....snore. Yeah, I fell asleep.  I generally do if given more than 15 minutes. When she came in I was feeling sad, and wary. Just tired and wary.  I was woozy when I sat up, even after taking my time.  Apparently two bites of a muffin 4 hours before wasn't enough food.

Deena and I spoke a bit during the entire procedure, her asking how I felt and explaining what was going on. I think she did an excellent job explaining the philosophy behind 5 point acupuncture and she put me at ease through the entire process.

So will it work?  I don't know.  The onslaught of depression has once again dimmed my doorstep as I swing from the manic, angry side of things to the sad depressed side.  I had a week of normal in between, which I'm grateful for.  Now...what to do. Do I try the drugs my doctor gave me, or do I keep trying acupuncture and find a therapist?  That is a post for another day.

If you have any questions--feel free to ask below. If you've had acupuncture done, how did your experience differ from mine?  Was similar?